How to Serve Others by Being an Excellent Communicator

All forms of communication have advantages and disadvantages. Media pioneer Marshall McLuhan said “the medium is the message.” He meant that any message would be subject to whatever benefits and constraints the medium placed on it. Each medium conveys a certain “resolution.” Resolution is another word for clarity or completeness of message. The higher the resolution, the more clearly and completely a message can be conveyed as intended. A lower resolution medium is “fuzzy” and thus the intended meaning can easily be missed. For example, face to face meetings are high resolution: all of a person’s facial expressions, gestures, posture and tone can be observed alongside his words. Likewise, email is very low resolution: you can see the words, but all non-verbal messages are mute.

Let’s look at another example. In the Bible, Jesus was attending a wedding, when his mother received word that the reception had run out of wine. Mary looked at Jesus and asked him to work a miracle, to which Jesus replied “Woman, why do you involve me? My hour has not come.” A low resolution reading of this phrase almost sounds provocative. Most biblical commentators, however, have additional, higher resolution perspective, and believe that the word “Woman” in Aramaic was actually a term of endearment and suggests a tender, even playful tone. We’d never know that from a plain reading.

A further example might be when a customer asks for an explanation as to why some of their product has a defect long after we sell it to them. First, maybe they phrase their email like this:

“Joe – we received a complaint from Safeway that some of our product is discolored. It could be a huge return. Can you pull lots and tell us why this is happening? -Craig”

First of all, the customer’s communication is incredibly low resolution, and Joe may not even be aware of that even though his emotions are triggered. Immediately, Joe gets a little frustrated. He forwards a note to his team and says “we need to tell them that some product does this – it’s not the end of the world.” Joe has just done something incredibly dangerous. He has ascribed a malicious tone to the customer and assumed that the customer is just being unreasonable, because most of the time, they are. Joe types up an email that says:

“Craig – this happens from time to time. Here’s a bunch of data that shows this happens. Let us know if you’d like to ship to our warehouse so we can take a look.”

Joe stops and thinks; this could be the one time they are being reasonable, but they are poor communicators. And guess what? It is our job to serve others, not the other way around. That’s the ethos of our company. Our job is to add resolution to every communication. This dawns on Joe. He realizes that the customer’s communication was low resolution, and he thinks of some questions to add resolution. He also removes the file he attached because he realizes that to the untrained eye, the data is almost meaningless, and even lowers the resolution. He deletes what he had typed and writes:

“Craig – thanks for the note and sorry to hear about the issue. Can you the best by date, the lot code, and the quantity of product affected? To do a deeper dive into possible cause, please send the returns to our warehouse. We will inspect them, determine a list of possible causes, and suggest some go forward steps.”

See the difference between Joe’s emails? There is a Hebrew proverb that says, “a gentle answer turns away wrath.” The second email is not only nicer, but it serves to comfort Craig. We may not get the exact answer Craig wants, but he knows he’s in good hands because:

1. Joe cares (“Sorry to hear about the issue”)

2. Joe is competent (He’s not flustered and he has a plan)

3. Joe is serving him (He’s not trying to defend himself – he’s solely focused on doing the work to help Craig’s business)

PACT Model

To be an outstanding company, we have to be outstanding individuals. To be outstanding individuals, we have to do things other people are not willing to do. Most people live by the “inverse Golden Rule”: treat people the way they treat me. The real path to being outstanding is to treat people the way you would have had them treat you, regardless of what they do to you. Hence, the PACT Model. This is a pact we make with ourselves to add resolution to every communication. Why? Adding resolution is a service to the other person. Sometimes, it means dressing up written communication to make sure there is no room to read malintent. Sometimes it means making a phone call instead. In every case, it means preparing before the communication, if possible, to make sure the interaction is as clear as possible. Here is what PACT stands for:

Perceptive: Have I given enough thought into what the other person really cares about here?

Analytical: Have I gathered truthful data points as a way of helping the other person gain insight?

Clear: Have I presented the data in a way that is easy to follow/understand? Data that is presented the other way can be damaging. It makes the other person feel stupid and defensive and it makes you look incompetent.

Timely: If I’m unable to quickly gather insights, have I at least kept the person up to date, showing them I care about the issue.

One last quick note on “Perceptive.” This one is incredibly valuable as you move forward in your career. We have had several customers ask us to help identify the cause of quality issues. While they may be looking for technical answers at the surface, they are really asking this question:

“Do you care about my business and are you partnering with me in improving it? Or, are you just another vendor who will only improve if I force you to?”

If you focus on answering that question instead of the direct question they are asking, the rest will fall into place. People have unrealistic expectations of other people. It happens all the time. We are going to fail to deliver satisfying answers to every question a customer or colleague asks. That said, if we are committed to serving the other person through PACT (especially being perceptive), we can strengthen the relationship even when we have nothing to offer analytically.

Further Reading & Watching

Can You Say…Hero? (Tom Junod): If you can get through this with dry eyes, you win. Fred Rogers may be the greatest master of his medium to ever live. He served children and adults alike by bringing truth and love to a complex world. He served through his ability to communicate.

The Audio Revolution (Alex Danco): More on the topic of resolution, and specifically, the role earbuds have played in shaping politics, economy, intellectualism and even social interaction (or lack thereof).

The Shallows: What the Internet is Doing to Your Brain (Nicholas Carr): If you can bear with Carr’s “pop-science” style, you may find his exploration of the science behind McLuhan’s declaration “the medium is the message” interesting.

Won’t You Be My Neighbor (Netflix): A higher resolution expose of Mr. Rogers’ mastery, this 2018 biographical documentary will inspire many.